On Not Being Thin

To start this story where it should end I have no desire to become thin.

I feel I have nothing in common with white affluent “Influencer” women who proselytize getting a “beach body.”

Using the term Thinspiration alarms me. No one needs to be thin if they’re going to go on a crazy “diet” to try to whittle down to their bones.

My body is at its “fighting weight” now. Which is great because by exercising I can burn off the anger I have at the injustice in society.

Hello folks–it wasn’t my goal to lose 20 pounds in the last 2 years. Nor do I like using the word “thin” or “skinny” to describe my body or anyone else’s body.

From the time I was 22 until I turned 23–in only one year–I gained 30 pounds. At five feet tall I was unhappy weighing 138 pounds. In the early 1990s I had about 5 sessions with an M.D. who had a practice focused on nutrition.

It took me 6 years to lose the extra weight.

In my forties I weighed 125 pounds.

Three months before I turned 46 I was going through a hard time. Suddenly and out of nowhere I told myself: “You must start lifting weights.”

Not at all so that I could lose weight or become “thin” or “skinny.”

I decided to lift weights as a coping mechanism for the emotional pain I was in. In March of this year I celebrated my 10th Anniversary of lifting weights.

So I went out and bought a cool DKNY pocketbook as a reward.

Again: the goal is not to be thin or skinny.

In the coming blog entries I’ll talk more about my weight lifting practice. I will review 3 health and fitness books that are right-on.

Too I will talk about my Left of the Dial lifestyle that is predicated on this motto:

“No judgments.”

Author: Chris Bruni

Christina Bruni is the author of the critically acclaimed memoir Left of the Dial. She contributed a chapter "Recovery is Within Reach" to Benessere Psicologico: Contemporary Thought on Italian American Mental Health. As well as an author and activist, Bruni is an artist and athlete.

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